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A Tale of Two Years (Part Two)

Posted by Marco D'Ercole, Jan. 25, 2010 in Personal

(Continued from Part I)

There is something about a new year that gets a person in a predictive frame of mind. A psychic to the stars I am not. But as a fairly successful company we have earned the right to claim some vision, I would think.

And so, without further ado, perched as we are on the brink of yet another decade, bereft of political stimulation thanks to prorogued news, weary of the effort required to stay abreast of the late-night talk-show scramble, I present my collection of predictions for the year ahead (complete with context from years past).

First off, take note. The Apple iPhone is going to take over the world. Or at least it’s poised to and would need to be victim to some serious natural disaster to tumble from its podium.

Are you listening, BlackBerry Jim and BlackBerry Mike? I’d respectfully suggest you plan for a massive comeback in 2010. FYI: The BlackBerry Storm was a very poor copy of the iPhone.  I still own a Blackberry, because typing 22 words per minute is not possible on the iPhone. Hint hint…

Still on the BlackBerry, it’s instructive, historically speaking, to reflect on the state of its earliest incarnation. Not pretty, and it was a single device, way back in its youth, for e-mailing alone—nothing else. Progress has been swift and effective here. I’d recommend some more.

And while we’re on about mobile technology and the distance it’s come, let’s hark back to the birth of mobile phones. I remember some of the very first: little more than enormous battery-carrying cases. And of course the Cantel 22lb Hammer!

Fast forward to today, when a mobile phone is less about facilitating conversation between two parties than it is about being the centre of the party. The latest cellphone is a phone, yes. But you almost sense that’s more a nod to conventional expectation than anything.

After all, this thing is also a camera, GPS, Bluetooth, MP3 player, time scheduler, Internet browser, alarm giver, video taker, note recorder and electronic mailer—that can place telephone calls as required. It has, in short, taken control of our lives.  And yet you still can’t turn the damn thing on when you’re in the air.

Next, let’s put the whole Dragon’s DenShark Tank debate to rest. Dragons are legendary creatures whose storied histories include no shortage of derring-do. Sharks? Well, they’re cold-blooded killers who always seem to be on the hunt for a decent meal. Hence, Dragons are cooler then Sharks. And the Canadians seem much more willing to close a deal than their American counterparts. Perhaps the spinoff show should have been called Chicken Tank. And why are Kevin O’Leary and Robert Herjavec featured on Shark’s Tank? They are Canadians! Where’s the Donald?

And let us dispatch with this shopping bag bylaw already. What a complete joke, especially the idea of charging a nickel for the things. This bit of government-implemented nonsense is not, in fact, greening the Earth, as we’ve been led to believe. Remember the ’80s? Retailers charged us for bags back then, too.

And, p.s.: It costs less than $.001 to make an enviro-unfriendly plastic bag. You do the math. Someone should invent a truly “green” plastic bag that will disintegrate when mixed with water. That would be some environmentally friendly thinking.

And finally, a bit of math to close out our forward view. Homeopathic plus modern medicine equals naturopathic. Excellent. Question: Why haven’t more medical doctors calculated this equation? Answer: Big-Pharma.

On to 2010.


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